How to Repair a Relationship | What Every Man Wants (but almost no Woman Gives)

I love to watch lovers relating to one another.  Love relationships are played out in movie themes, plays, music and current events on the news. So much so, that many of us have distorted views of what a romantic relationship is and unrealistic expectations of how to love one another.

As we watch with curiosity and amazement—the tendency is to judge our own personal relationships from these highly visible encounters.  There is no way to know why these relationships didn’t work. Where is the help on how to repair a relationship?

Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women'...
Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Sexual Fantasies (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

On more than one occasion I have found myself commenting about someone’s relationship:

  • “I don’t know why Janice and Bobby ever got married, they are total opposites. He’s outgoing and she’s dull and lifeless.
  • On the other hand, I went to Tanya and John’s wedding– they were a beautiful couple and seemed so in love.  Didn’t last 2 years.
  • But I must say the real shocker wasNancy and Tom—married 35 years.  Now, if you stay together that long—why would you be getting a divorce?

I should be shocked at some of these lost relationships. But again, I wonder how to repair a relationship—is there a tool to help couples create the relationship they desire?

As President of www.OneStopLegalSolution.com , a legal document preparation company, I know the stories of countless women seeking a divorce. We prepare divorce documents and I hear the stories of infidelity, loneliness and unhappiness. Many of these women express a desire to live passionately and vibrantly—right now, with the right person.

Out of all the divorces we’ve prepared, I heard similar statements:

  • I’d rather be married
  • I still love him but I don’t know how to make it work
  • I wish I knew how to get his attention—I want to feel loved.

If you desire to experience passionate and vibrant love relations with your current spouse, boyfriend–or you want to prepare for a new relationship—I found a tool that can help you enhance or create change in your relationships. I think you’ll discover how to repair a relationship and get the love you desire.

If your man is not communicating, ignoring you or just doesn’t seem to care—you need to take action—NOW!

Click Here to learn more:  What EVERY man wants (but almost NO woman gives)…

Then come back and join the conversation.  What did you do to get your man’s attention and renewed love interest?

 

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How to Keep Up The Loving: Creative Ideas For Your Long- Distance Relationship

Long Distance Relationships
Long Distance Relationships (Photo credit: valordictus)

 
Engaging in a long-distance relationship can be quite difficult! To keep things new and intriguing, take time to send special messages to your beloved on a frequent basis.

Use popular messenger services like Facebook, Yahoo, Skype, etc. to keep your love life jumping, although especially since its long distance. The added benefit of using these instant message services is that you two will each have some privacy and can reinforce the depth of your communication this way. It’s a good bet to instant messaging as often as you both can!

Get really creative by writing a letter or finding a picture of something you have shared together. Paste the letter or picture to a piece of cardboard and then cut it into several puzzle pieces. Send your long distance love a few pieces every other day in the mail and once they have completed the puzzle send some roses in celebration of their accomplishment!

You can also send a package with a cd of passionate songs you two enjoy from an earlier time you were together. Send out something sweet like fruit or candy too, and if they enjoy stuffed animals you should send that as well. Tell them how much they’re missed and how you imagine them continuously. There is really no way to mess this up unless you if you just do nothing. Otherwise, almost anything you can come up with is a fantastic way to let your love know you’re thinking about them regardless of the distance between the two of you.

Another idea is to have someone take photos of you and produce a hand crafted calendar, sounds simple enough right? Well it certainly is! Get into to the spirit of it, create a master piece and they’ll love it! Grab some card-stock paper and glue a decorative border on each side. Print a copy of it on the printer and increase the size of the pictures, then paste them to the paper. Next print out boxes on the computer for the days and decorate each day,  month or week. Finally place your creation  together with a nice ribbon and send it to your mate with love. Your loved one will love your hard work!

Alternately you can send your sweetheart some letters adorned with your favorite scent. Cut old clothing and soak pieces of the fabric with your scent and include those in the package and the smell will last even longer.

Nobody wants to miss an important occasion with their loved one. Who says you have to? There are ways to share the magical times together in spite of whatever distances between the two of you. If you can’t be together to share a special moment, simply send your long distance lover take out by ordering from a restaurant where your mate  lives and have dinner delivered to them. Make sure you order your love’s favorite meal. Then use your webcams to enjoy dinner together.

Instead of sending your love a hand-written letter, hand deliver a personalized cd with your special message on it, and share details of your thoughts for them when you next meet. They can listen to the tape when the two of you can’t talk by phone or computer when they want to hear your voice.
Delight your mate by arranging for a delivery of their favorite flowers! Include a handwritten card professing your love for your lover. They’ll be so warm and mushy inside from your thoughtfulness.

Style and design a website in your lovers honor. Devote the site to your sweet romance and incorporate quotes, poetry, affirmations  and thoughts, photographs, romantic messages, also add the history of how you two met, and any other information to bring  a smile to their face.

Your partner would enjoy a virtual greeting card from you one day too, try it. Grab their email address and send them straight to their inbox as often as you’d like.

Collect a record of all of your emails over your relationship. As soon as  you have accumulated at least a year of emails print them all out and separate them by topic, month or day.

Last, make a front page that connects all the sweet things that you’ve enjoyed together. Include a collage of pictures, too. Take your print to a printer shop to have the pages binded into a real book! Make sure to give your ‘book of distance love’ a title, like “Love is Sweet” include the perfect book title on the cover. You’ll be glad you took the extra time. Your love can last throughout time now that it’s in a book. Enjoy your love life no matter what.

The Ladies Guide To Dating And Male Interaction: 10 Rules

Relax love ain’t going nowhere.

1. You will lessen your chances to attract and keep a man if you run after men all the time. Ok ladies, yea i know he’s fine..probably super fine. I get that. But give that man some space. Always remember the line from back in the day: If it’s for you it isn’t going anywhere. I’m here to reiterate that to you. There’s a better way than wishing things will blossom with a man by telling him how much you are thinking about him repeatedly, or telling him all your business thinking that you two will form a bond that way. NO NO NO. As a woman who has been on some dates in my lifetime and spoken with hundreds of woman and studied relationships over all. I’m here to tell you personally from a man’s perspective MEN WANT TO BE THE MAN. You gotta allow a man to pursue you. Most men are that way, at least that’s what they tell me. So ladies, put your energy into being receptive to a man getting to know you. Relax and enjoy the process of slow movement. Yes, you can still call the shots overall..Because i’m not talking about having sex with a man to be receptive to him, while you’re getting to know him. Honestly..we will speak more on that one in a few minutes.

You are where it’s at!

2. Your chances of landing a solid, healthy relationship will drop to almost 1% if you are needy and don’t want to be alone. I’ll say it again. Yes the man is shole nuff fine. However it is you I’m concerned about here. Think about your life this way, you were born alone. You should learn the magic art of being happy and content right now. Sure it is easy to do when you have a healthy support system in place. The important thing to know is that, NO man comes along to be your support system. You alone have to learn the art of making that a reality for yourself. Everyone isn’t cut out to be a counselor, coach or consultant. So why would you expect a stranger to provide such services to you, out of the clear blue sky and on top of that…FREE. No honey. I feel you but you have to enjoy the skin you’re in. Think about some of the things you enjoy doing and visualize the joy of doing them with yourself. The world will be much brighter once you take your time and smile about what you have access to. YOU HAVE IT ALL. Look at you:-). Think of it this way, how will a man want to spend time with you, if you don’t want to do the same. There is something magical that happens..i’m here to tell you personally! When you get into what you enjoy, even if it involves helping others in someway..thats even better! The universe shifts to bring you the people who match your frequency energetically. i’m not playing. Work it out and give it a shot. You owe it to you to enjoy life even more. And don’t think about a relationship like that, because your date is waiting for your vibration to raise up and then like a magician, he will certainly show his face.

Slow down, Enjoy.

3. Trust me when i say: Men enjoy a challenge. If you give everything on the first date: is there really an incentive for a man to stay around and get to know more about you? Probably not. Right. So here’s the deal. There are so many other things you and your fine date can get into to with your clothes on. Also it is better to keep all your deep childhood history and past relationship details to yourself. Studies show that a conversation about past relationships and sex both have damaging effects on a future potential relationship between two people. Why is that? Hmm i would say it’s because man want women who are light and joyful. If you share a story where you experience the entire misfortune in your head and you allow him to experience your thoughts and feelings about too much of your life too soon. He may not call back. You want to keep life simple and move on from the past before you decide to move into the hot land of relationships. I’m here to tell you. This will save you so much time and frustration in the future. Take your time. Rock his world with mystery not the heavy baggage.

Real recognizes real.

4. Learn to be yourself, don’t fake it. The truth will always come out. Whoever you are..trust there is someone out there just for you. Sure it might be cute to act like you are someone you are not. The question is, how long will you be able to keep that up. Over time everyone lets their masks fall and people will always know more of what is there. Karma is something. Just be you. If you don’t like who you are. Change it up. Elevate, Get creative and mix it up. We all have work to do. Keep it real and everything will be right!

There are other men out there.

5. Never compromise your standards just to have an attractive man on your tip. You know what I’m talking about. He looks good, smells like paradise but he has no values, no game plan and he wears his draws down to his knees . He told you he was not ever getting married. He said he wants to be single for life. HA! OK. So that’s not your ideal man. You knew it when he started breaking it down to you at lunch or on the corner. You aren’t that damn lonely. This is why its important to learn to love yourself. If you aren’t joyful about your life and who you are. You may fall for anything. You are way too smart to waste your life on people undeserving of your time. The next time you see something or someone who doesn’t fall in line with your Values (if you don’t have some, get some) my advice: KEEP IT MOVING BLISSFULLY…HONEY you don’t have time for that!

Be honest.

6. Listen to your heart..the inner wisdom..if something doesn’t feel right its a good idea to talk about it or move on from it. Here is a good example: You are on a date with a sexy man. He’s charming, sweet and opening up to you. everything goes well until (OH NO HE DIDN’T)… OH YES HE DID: He reaches down and grabs your behind. It’s the first date. You are looking like? ‘Uh i’m not feeling that.’ At that point you have a couple of choices on how to deal with it. First of all, stay calm. There’s no need to act up. Let’s not put too much energy into this. Instead, feel your inner wisdom and if you know whatever this man did is outside of your (VALUES) then you can say peace..thank you for the nice time and say i have to go now, and talk to him later about it or never again. Its best not to get into it while on the date as it will leave a staleness in the air. When the date is over you can politely tell him If you are planning on going out with him..let him know who you are and what your values are. Keep it brief. If he wants to really get to know you. He will totally understand. And if he doesn’t its just the opposite and that’s quite alright too. You have absolutely nothing to lose but foolishness. So smile and be proud of yourself for whatever decision you make. You will be glad you did. You know it too.

Is he into you?

7. If men don’t call you, they are just not interested! I’ve been there, you’ve been there. Waiting by the phone for a phone call. Excuse me, i know some of you haven’t had that experience since home phones were hot. There are so many reasons to call you right? RIGHT! so if you hear a man telling you all this sweet stuff. But, he never gets around to calling you, EVER. He’s not that into you. Period. There is no other way to interpret this thing. We all know it takes communication of some sort to get to know someone on any level. We all can agree that relationships don’t just happen by accident. They certainly don’t. So if he is across the world, there is a way to contact you, If he is working late, he can call you, if its been a month and he hasn’t called… fill in the blank again with the same words (he’s not that into you) If you think you should chase a man down to get his attention. Uhh please re-read the rules from the top down. If you don’t trust this. Just try it and find out. Better yet. Just take my word for it and call it a day. Go do your toes or watch a movie. But don’t sit around waiting in vain. If you are just friends that all it is.

You set the pace

8. Men like to take their time too, even though it may not seem like it to you. Some women move too fast for even men. I’m talking about men that want to be in a relationship or married with a family one day. Back to the loose women, Yeah i know we’re not talking about you here. However some women have this idea of covering up the pain they have inside by repeating their mistakes over and over with men who either don’t want them in any other way but sexually or they throw themselves at men that are already spoken for. You deserve better and they deserve better. If only you knew how Karma works is all I’ll say. Sistahs it’s not worth it. He damn sure ain’t worth it. And the entire situation is a waste of energy to top it all. Nothing good can ever come of it. There are men who say they want to take their time. Some men have told me that women never make them wait for even 6 months before they sleep with them. They even said they would love to have a woman who would make them wait. Of course that’s some men. But trust me ladies its more men that want us to make them wait than the other way around. And women don’t know the power they have. If you have read all the rules until this point you know the ball is in your court. All I’ll say here is get some values my sistahs. Enjoy the little things. It’s not too late to make a change either.

Law of Attraction and you.

9. You attract men on the same vibration that you are on. Don’t be mad at this one simply change you and you will see a whole new model in your life of friends and of course in the men you attract. This one is a no-brainer..its all about the Law of Attraction. It’s not personal. When you learn to love you, the world will too.

Allow room for growth to take place.

10. Don’t Expect a man to change unless you want him to resent you. Bossing a man around is not the way into his heart. That’s right. Last time i checked, resentment was not one of the elements of a happy healthy relationship. If you want to build a solid relationship with your potential lover, you have to allow him to make mistakes and allow him to learn from them. We as woman are allowed that luxury so we owe it to the men to give them the same love and respect. We are all on earth to learn the lessons of life. Most people had a personality and a life before they ever met us. We have to remember that and celebrate who they are. Of course foolishness and unhealthy behavior should be talked about but choose your talks wisely. You don’t want to create a problem where there is none. And some comments/ perceptions/ observations should be reflected (within us) before they should be considered conversation worthy. Sometimes we as women feel we should protect our interests in every possible way so no one can take advantage of us. This is why sometimes some women make a fuss when there is none. In-fact the only issue sometimes is the thoughts. Learn to visualize peaceful things and love. See your mate healed and being all that you know they are holistically. Your visualizations will help to bring out the good in them. Use your powerful imagination ladies to bring about change in you and in your families. Indeed our greatest strength is within.

What’s Your Favorite Place To Go On A Date?

Top Reasons For Choosing Sexual Abstinence

Continue reading this post here. This one is very interesting.

The Official Blog of Sereda Aleta Dailey

Absti- What? lol. Yes, the A word that we all know as choosing to not have sex for a period of time. We at Bliss Returned are advocates for anything that will bring bliss back to the planet. Would this do it? Well certainly the entire world won’t have to do it at once for us to see some changes in the world but let’s just say: slowing down a bit could not hurt some of the folks in the world. 

How could anyone choose a thing like abstinence? The only thing needed to live with the choice of being sexually abstinent, is the choice to actually go without having sex. It is truly that simple. Pills, loads of chocolate and coffee will not be necessary either.

From our research it seems that sexual abstinence in 2011 continuing to 2012 is still in full effect. (Insert a clap…

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Holistic Dating / Take 1

I am sure we all can agree on one thing here before i get into this dating article. We all have so much in common, like most of us were taught to respond to life according to the advice of our parents or other adults or even siblings or perhaps an older friend. It is true-

We know there was no master manual on how to be a parent. How many of us have stories to share about that, no matter what some may think about their upbringing overall, the people in charge did the best they could with what they knew.

Parenting and teaching the youth is a HUGE job, however some adults gladly signed up to make a baby or babies. Some planned it and some did not. After they had their children they still had no manual on how to raise a child. They relied on their overall experiences to pass on what they knew to be right or wrong. The manual for dating was never written for anyone else either. Then again, you can say it was written, as new book is published on a regular basis. This is true regarding the manual on parenting as well. Books are written by people with personal experiences and perceptions usually.

Due to the level of  ‘manuals’ out there, one would wonder why there are issues in the dating world. With no commitment or long term plans between two people how can there be any issues at all? With all the knowledge men and women have available to them how can they not know what works or doesn’t work in the dating arena?

As funny as it sounds, that is the reality in the world. Two people with no connection to one another financially or any other…These persons have misunderstandings, large and small issues, the same story-

Dating can be a delightful journey if its done in a certain way. The problem is that we are all a bit different in what we prefer, want or say we need from our potential future mate. There are some details that run people off from dating. They even call the dating scene a mess. Not caring to deal with all the dating surprises and festivities- some people have chosen never to date or if they do it’s on a rare occasion.

For one thing, everyone is bringing with them the teachings of someone they grew up with , who had their own experiences. You have never met that person who influenced them, may never meet them either and the source of your dating interests dating knowledge or lack there of.. may have learned nothing about dating. So here is this person you are interested in who knows nothing about dating. Alright let’s just say the person you are interested in learned about dating, If they did, they have not met you yet, right..lol. That’s a favorite line these days.

It is funny, people do not think about the research they should do before stepping out into the dating scene. ONE to find out about what it is they want, and TWO to see what traits, characteristics, looks, values, etc…they want in their potential future lover. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with dating without looking for love at all. It is fine. Casual is great. No pressure. But we will need a game plan at some point.

There are old school teachings that can assist us right now with relating to others’ in my opinion. I’m forever young. However, every year i still get older (age wise) anyway. In the time that it has taken me to get to the age i am now- I have seen life from a different perspective. Others’ single folks have too. Especially after embracing the two things i listed above. (Read# Points One and Two in CAPS)

We cannot expect to know what we are getting into if we do not do our homework and research. I mean if you only want a warm body in your bed then you can just jump right in to dating without any ground work and you will still have the same 50/50 chance of having success even in that fast  moving department. So with the chances being 50/50 for those who do not do the research before going out with someone for something as simple as dinner- how can we expect anything of quality at all from out interactions with anyone?

Mmmm I don’t know?

Yea i know.

Why should we take our time? Here is a reason. Lying (NOT TELLING THE TRUTH) tops the list on why dating can be perceived as a mess some folks care not to deal with.  Hey i feel you. After being told some untrue information repeatedly by a stream of people back to back,  there may be months, years or weeks between the multiple people doing the lying. Why even bother? Some say.

Who is doing the lying? Too many to name, apparently. From my research, lying in the midst of dating can come from either a man or woman. This has always been true. We all have a choice, some choose to tell a lie. Karma may not phase them either. And for some, they could care less about the returned energy of their actions. The real question is… Why lie at all? That’s the billion dollar question. Maybe these people just need healing. This is a part of the inner work that should be done before we look for a long term relationship.

I am grateful that I have knowledge of qi gong and the 5 organ profile system. I am ever thankful for the understanding that people are sick (unbalanced health wise) over all and do not even know it. Once i learned qi gong and the 5 organ system and how it plays a role in why people say they will do something, want to do things but lack the vitality to do them. Afterwards, i changed my dating tune completely. I know the signs to look for now. What signs am i looking for? Well i personally want to raise a family one day with a big strong man by my side. I want healthy children as well. For this to happen the man must be healthy (vital) too.

This is just an example of one thing one may have on their list of things they want in a potential mate. This potential mate has to start off as a date basically. Also, in my experience they should become a friend before the relationship comes. An elder once said this, if you and your mate ever break up, you will at least have a friend in them. The benefit of making a friend before getting into a relationship with someone benefits us all the way around. A friend is great to have in a mate, i find that balance naturally comes after a  friendship has been established with someone. After we have a friend, the possibilities are endless indeed.

There is so much to write on the subject of dating that i will continue this post in several parts. Summing up tonight’s post and what its about…Thus far, I have written about the importance of patience and friendship before making any possible regretful moves that we have not planned for ourselves. Waiting never hurt in the name of love. Why rush?

Thanks for reading this. Comments are welcome as always. <3~Bliss to you~

Sereda~  The Bliss Goddess